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all in... OneSwellFoop
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The official registered URL is: www.oneswellfoop.com, but for now, all links lead to: oneswellfoop.tripod.com which I explain here.
All questions, complaints, suggestions, compliments or expressions of apathy are being accepted at oneswellfoop@mail.com


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Monday, December 06, 1999


Swell & Swolen The Foop's Department of Rants, Raves and Reviews
Must check my calendar. We must be entering the silly season. John Dvorak's feature for Boardwatch consists of two pages ranting against SPAM and a page praising olive oil. (from Robo-Jorn)

I hate to disagree with any of John Scalzi's choices for The Best of the Millenium, but as far as the Best 15 Minutes of Fame are concerned, Monica Lewinsky can't hold a candle (or a cigar - couldn't resist) to Hazel Frederick, the woman caught on film looking at Mary Tyler Moore throwing her hat in the famous TV opening. Now there was someone who really wasn't pursing fame, power, sex or anything; she was just wondering what the hubbub was out in the plaza with the cameras and the woman with the hat. And she didn't even meet her "co-star" until more than 20 years later. But her death (the same day Scalzi immoralized - excuse me - immortalized Monica) made the news. Of course, it was a slow news day, but that pretty much sums up what Hazel Frederick was all about: she was at the right place at the right time.


OXY2K Sigh. Still trying to fix my Credits page, so I think I'd better give some credit here in the 'blog: John G. Robertson "Senior Scribe" has a good educational site with (before I did the OXY2K) the largest list of Oxymorons I could find on the web. Over 1100 oxys, including over 300 that weren't on anybody else's list (I used only half of them in my list; we disagree somewhat on what makes a good oxy).


Linkin' Log So, what does it take for a new website featuring above-average geek humor have to do to get noticed? Well, just like a prime-time TV sitcom, sometimes it helps to do a Very Special Episode. And if you're Benjy Feen, and you're in a Seattle office building in the middle of the WTO Riots, sometimes the Very Special Episode comes to you.
Among Benjy's regular writing, my personal favorite is his analysis of non-linear humor, titled "Putting Underwear on the Dog", which contains some excellent examples (I don't often giggle at my computer), plus literary references to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which counts for me.

Punchline News So, what have we learned from the events in Seattle?
1: that the WTO stands for "World Tirade Association"
2: you shouldn't be surprised that the police overreacted in the first city where Starbucks replaced all the donut shops
3: "Free trade" is not what happens at Burger King's Pokemon night
4: "Civil disturbance" and "fair trade" belong on the OXY2K
By the way, LARadio.com had some interesting sidelights to the WTO crisis: apparently, one L.A. local talk jockey went to Seattle to do a remote broadcast, just so he could ridicule free-trade opponents wearing Nikes; there was a smattering of signs promoting syndicated schlock talker Tom (Doesn't) Leykis who gets his highest ratings in the NorthWest; and some of L.A.'s top radio talent don't even come in to the studio - they do their shows from their homes, including half of KROQ's morning team, and HE lives in Seattle! (he missed the unrest and tear gas - he was in L.A. last week for contract negotiations)
In other news, the potential loss of the Mars Polar Lander (no relation to David L. Lander) inspired an oxymoronic headline this weekend: Mars Probe Maintains Deafening Silence.
Police Say Dead Man Was Not A Celebrity. I know this story makes L.A.'s police, media and general public sound like heartless jerks, but if you read the whole story, you'll learn that the speculation arose because (1) the LAPD had mobilized a special investigative team that usually only handles "high profile" situations, and (2) the Holiday Inn with the parking lot where the body was found has a very notable long-term resident, whose initials are O.J. So, when you get all the facts, you'll understand that in L.A. we ARE all heartless jerks!


Blog Party!!! I Am Proud to announce that I've finally made the Open Directory's Web Log List, but I've been beaten to the Yahoo List by The Stuffed Dog (a.k.a. Overfed Pitbull) and twernt (a.k.a. twas too!). What I don't understand is how The Scoop Index got on Yahoo. With all our individual and collective desires to quantify everything (not to mention enough ego-driven competitiveness to fuel a college football team in Texas), this seems to be the device that goes just a little bit farther than humanity was meant to go. (In other words, it don't work!) Note that, as of 1:00PM PST, Beebo's Metalog is credited with 4 "scoops", which should not be possible because nothing appears on that list until it's been on at least 4 OTHER 'blogs.

If everything is functioning correctly, you should see one blue 'sidebar' column on the right. If not, please e-mail me, but break it to me gently... As for the content of the sidebar, yes, like many others, I have trimmed down my 'blog list. Some of them were deleted with extreme prejudice, others just accidentally fell off and rolled under the couch. Several just barely missed the cut, but will definately be on my Personal Portal Page fro all to see when I get THAT done. Call it "The Beebo Effect", but it seemed the best way to express my support to them I support the most; also, it helped shrink my oversized index page.



1999 by Wendell Wittler, all rights and several lefts reserved. Nedstat Counter for index.html